{"id":439887,"date":"2026-04-23T10:35:15","date_gmt":"2026-04-23T08:35:15","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/?p=439887"},"modified":"2026-04-23T10:22:45","modified_gmt":"2026-04-23T08:22:45","slug":"philogynes-hommes-discours-deroutant-sur-femmes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\/vie-amoureuse\/philogynes-men-confusing-discourse-on-women-439887","title":{"rendered":"Who are the &quot;philogynes,&quot; these men with their perplexing discourse about women?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>At first glance, the word is intriguing. &quot;Philogyne&quot; literally means &quot;loving women.&quot; Yet, behind this rather positive definition, the term has taken on a very different meaning in certain online spaces. And this discrepancy deserves closer examination.<\/p>\n<h2> A word diverted from its original meaning<\/h2>\n<p> Derived from ancient Greek, the term &quot;philogyny&quot; combines &quot;philo&quot; (to love) and &quot;gyn\u00e9&quot; (woman). On paper, it might almost appear to be the opposite of misogyny. However, in certain online communities, particularly those within masculinist circles, this word is now used in a sense far removed from this idea.<\/p>\n<p>It&#39;s no longer about &quot;loving women,&quot; but rather about adopting behaviors and discourses that remain centered on an unbalanced view of gender relations. These groups, increasingly visible on social media and certain platforms, often develop content critical of feminist advances and progress toward greater equality.<\/p>\n<h2> A logic of performance rather than of encounter<\/h2>\n<p> In these circles, &quot;philogynes&quot; are often associated with a very specific practice: multiplying interactions with women in public spaces. The goal is not so much to create a genuine connection as to &quot;perform.&quot; How many women approached in a day? How many phone numbers obtained? How many rejections received? These figures become indicators of success.<\/p>\n<p>This dynamic transforms the exchange into a personal challenge. The other person is no longer truly perceived as an individual with their own desires, limits, and pace, but as a step in a kind of journey to be completed. Needless to say, the idea of a balanced and respectful relationship takes a hit. <\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"tiktok-embed\" style=\"max-width: 605px; min-width: 325px;\" cite=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/@lesphilogynes_\/video\/7147827713322011909\" data-video-id=\"7147827713322011909\">\n<section> <a title=\"@lesphilogynes_\" href=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/@lesphilogynes_?refer=embed\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">@lesphilogynes_<\/a> Stop paying for women <a title=\"flirting\" href=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/tag\/drague?refer=embed\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">#flirting<\/a> <a title=\"seduction\" href=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/tag\/s%C3%A9duction?refer=embed\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">#seduction<\/a> <a title=\"\u266c Original sound - The Philogynes\" href=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/music\/son-original-7148074576568634117?refer=embed\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\u266c original sound - Les Philogynes<\/a><\/section>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"https:\/\/www.tiktok.com\/embed.js\"><\/script><\/p>\n<h2> When the approach becomes intrusive<\/h2>\n<p> Presented as techniques for flirting or building self-confidence, these practices can actually be problematic. Repeatedly approaching women on the street, without regard for their consent or discomfort, can quickly become intrusive. For many, it amounts to a form of everyday harassment.<\/p>\n<p>This type of behavior contributes to normalizing unsolicited interactions in spaces where everyone should be able to move freely, without pressure or insistence. From a body-positive and respectful perspective, this highlights an essential point: every person deserves to have their space, their body, and their boundaries respected, without negotiation.<\/p>\n<h2> &quot;Coaches&quot; with well-rehearsed speeches<\/h2>\n<p> Alongside these practices, there are also content creators who present themselves as experts in love stories or dating. Their promise? To teach you how to &quot;succeed&quot; in your interactions. Their method? Often based on techniques, scripts, or strategies to apply.<\/p>\n<p>Behind this apparent focus on personal development, the messages conveyed are sometimes problematic. Women can be described in very generalized ways, as if they all responded to the same mechanisms. Love stories then become systems to be deciphered, rather than human exchanges built on listening, respect, and consent.<\/p>\n<h2> A competition between men<\/h2>\n<p> In these communities, interactions with women are also perceived as a form of male competition. &quot;Performances&quot; are compared, analyzed, and sometimes even publicly celebrated. This creates implicit pressure: to prove one&#39;s worth through the ability to attract female attention.<\/p>\n<p>This type of dynamic can lead to a rather rigid view of masculinity, where external validation becomes central. Conversely, healthy relationships are based on authenticity, mutual respect, and the freedom to be oneself, without the pressure to perform.<\/p>\n<h2> A phenomenon that reveals current tensions<\/h2>\n<p> The emergence of &quot;philogynes&quot; is part of a broader context. The trend towards greater gender equality is challenging certain traditional norms. In response, some communities are reacting with withdrawal or protest, sometimes caricaturing the relationships between men and women.<\/p>\n<p>Ultimately, behind this flattering term lies a more complex reality. &quot;Philogynes&quot; illustrate the potential pitfalls when human relationships are reduced to strategies or performance. And they implicitly remind us of a crucial idea: fulfilling relationships are built on respect, consent, and recognition of each individual in all their uniqueness.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"At first glance, the word is intriguing. &quot;Philogyne&quot; literally means &quot;loving women.&quot; Yet, behind this rather positive definition,...","protected":false},"author":8395,"featured_media":439888,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"disable_msn":true,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5717],"tags":[97833,97372],"class_list":["post-439887","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-vie-amoureuse","tag-actu","tag-relation"],"image":{"medium":["https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/04\/Alexander-Mass-_-Pexels-200x113.jpg",200,113,true],"large":["https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/04\/Alexander-Mass-_-Pexels-500x281.jpg",500,281,true]},"custom":{"td_video":"","featured_image":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/04\/Alexander-Mass-_-Pexels.jpg","author":{"name":"Clelia Campardon","avatar":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/04\/clelia-96x96.jpg"},"categories":[{"term_id":5717,"name":"Love life","slug":"vie-amoureuse","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":5885,"taxonomy":"category","description":"<p>The Love life section of The Body Optimist unpacks relationships in all their forms: dating, attraction, life as a couple, jealousy, breakups and being single. Advice from therapists, psychological insights and personal stories help you build healthy, balanced relationships, with no pressure to couple up and no one-size-fits-all model.<\/p>\n<h2>What you\u2019ll find in the Love life section<\/h2>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>Dating and attraction<\/strong>: dating apps, first dates, meeting people offline and feeling confident when someone is looking at you.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Communication<\/strong>: the five love languages, words that soothe and those that wear a relationship down, and why <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\/vie-amoureuse\/fexting-why-arguing-by-text-message-often-complicates-things-444706\">arguing by text<\/a> so often backfires.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Toxic relationships<\/strong>: jealousy, possessiveness, love bombing and manipulation, with tips to spot red flags such as <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\/vie-amoureuse\/all-my-crazy-exes-red-flag-lovers-minimize-too-often-444547\">the partner for whom all their exes are \u201ccrazy\u201d<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Breakups<\/strong>: grieving a relationship, getting over a letdown, no longer dwelling on your ex, and why some exes move on so fast, explained by <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\/vie-amoureuse\/why-some-exes-quickly-get-involved-in-new-relationships-after-a-breakup-the-taxi-theory-explained-433348\">the taxi theory<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Balance as a couple<\/strong>: keeping your friends, your projects and your own space, even in a relationship.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Every love story<\/strong>: LGBTQIA+ couples, age gaps, long-distance relationships, chosen singlehood.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h2>How do you get over a breakup?<\/h2>\n<p>Getting over a breakup takes time, and the pain often feels like grief: sadness, anger, nostalgia and relief can take turns. A few steps help you through it: limit contact with your ex and the urge to check their social media, put away objects that stir up memories, lean on friends and family rather than isolating yourself, get back to your routines (sleep, meals, movement) and reinvest in activities that are yours alone. Writing down what you feel helps put your thoughts in order. If the sadness lasts for weeks and keeps you from functioning day to day, a therapist can help you move forward.<\/p>\n<h2>Our take on love<\/h2>\n<p>We don\u2019t see being in a couple as a goal to reach: single, exclusive, living together without marrying or in a decades-long relationship, every path deserves to be told without judgment. Our articles reject the idea that you need to change your body to be loved, and remind you that excessive jealousy and control are never proof of love. They speak to all couples, straight and LGBTQIA+, and offer guidance without claiming to replace couples therapy or psychological support.<\/p>\n<h2>Where to start<\/h2>\n<ul>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\/vie-amoureuse\/can-we-really-change-a-narcissist-psychologists-answer-without-hesitation-428646\">Can a narcissist really change?<\/a>: what psychologists answer, and what it means for you.<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\/vie-amoureuse\/these-7-evening-rituals-that-happy-couples-share-431716\">Evening rituals of happy couples<\/a>: seven simple habits to stay close day after day.<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\/vie-amoureuse\/the-777-rule-avoid-routine-in-a-relationship-436391\">The 7-7-7 rule<\/a>: a simple plan to keep routine from taking over your relationship.<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\/vie-amoureuse\/romantic-cliches-in-cinema-have-taught-us-to-believe-446825\">Romantic movie myths<\/a>: the clich\u00e9s about love that films taught us to believe.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h2>Frequently asked questions<\/h2>\n<h3>How can you tell if a relationship is toxic?<\/h3>\n<p>A relationship becomes toxic when one partner controls, belittles or isolates the other: checking their phone, constant criticism, emotional blackmail, swinging between passionate declarations and coldness. \u201cNarcissist\u201d gets used loosely online, but narcissistic personality disorder is a clinical diagnosis: focus on behaviors rather than labels. If you\u2019re facing violence, contact a domestic violence hotline or your local emergency services.<\/p>\n<h3>What are the five love languages?<\/h3>\n<p>Developed by American marriage counselor Gary Chapman, the five love languages are words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service and physical touch. The idea is that each person tends to express and receive affection in a preferred way. It\u2019s a popular framework for avoiding misunderstandings, not a scientifically validated theory.<\/p>\n<h3>How can you meet someone without dating apps?<\/h3>\n<p>Connections often grow out of activities you repeat over time: a sports club, a choir, a community group, volunteering, evening classes. Say yes to invitations, let friends introduce you to their circle, and start conversations around a shared interest. The goal isn\u2019t to impress at all costs but to create more chances to connect.<\/p>\n<p>Keep exploring: find all our <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\">sex and relationship topics<\/a>, pleasure and sexual health in <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\/sexualite\">Sexuality<\/a>, wedding planning and anniversaries in <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\/mariage\">Marriage<\/a>, and tools to stand your ground in <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/psycho\/confiance-en-soi\">Self-confidence<\/a>.<\/p>","parent":6135,"count":709,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":5717,"category_count":709,"category_description":"<p>The Love life section of The Body Optimist unpacks relationships in all their forms: dating, attraction, life as a couple, jealousy, breakups and being single. Advice from therapists, psychological insights and personal stories help you build healthy, balanced relationships, with no pressure to couple up and no one-size-fits-all model.<\/p>\n<h2>What you\u2019ll find in the Love life section<\/h2>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>Dating and attraction<\/strong>: dating apps, first dates, meeting people offline and feeling confident when someone is looking at you.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Communication<\/strong>: the five love languages, words that soothe and those that wear a relationship down, and why <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\/vie-amoureuse\/fexting-why-arguing-by-text-message-often-complicates-things-444706\">arguing by text<\/a> so often backfires.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Toxic relationships<\/strong>: jealousy, possessiveness, love bombing and manipulation, with tips to spot red flags such as <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\/vie-amoureuse\/all-my-crazy-exes-red-flag-lovers-minimize-too-often-444547\">the partner for whom all their exes are \u201ccrazy\u201d<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Breakups<\/strong>: grieving a relationship, getting over a letdown, no longer dwelling on your ex, and why some exes move on so fast, explained by <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\/vie-amoureuse\/why-some-exes-quickly-get-involved-in-new-relationships-after-a-breakup-the-taxi-theory-explained-433348\">the taxi theory<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Balance as a couple<\/strong>: keeping your friends, your projects and your own space, even in a relationship.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Every love story<\/strong>: LGBTQIA+ couples, age gaps, long-distance relationships, chosen singlehood.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h2>How do you get over a breakup?<\/h2>\n<p>Getting over a breakup takes time, and the pain often feels like grief: sadness, anger, nostalgia and relief can take turns. A few steps help you through it: limit contact with your ex and the urge to check their social media, put away objects that stir up memories, lean on friends and family rather than isolating yourself, get back to your routines (sleep, meals, movement) and reinvest in activities that are yours alone. Writing down what you feel helps put your thoughts in order. If the sadness lasts for weeks and keeps you from functioning day to day, a therapist can help you move forward.<\/p>\n<h2>Our take on love<\/h2>\n<p>We don\u2019t see being in a couple as a goal to reach: single, exclusive, living together without marrying or in a decades-long relationship, every path deserves to be told without judgment. Our articles reject the idea that you need to change your body to be loved, and remind you that excessive jealousy and control are never proof of love. They speak to all couples, straight and LGBTQIA+, and offer guidance without claiming to replace couples therapy or psychological support.<\/p>\n<h2>Where to start<\/h2>\n<ul>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\/vie-amoureuse\/can-we-really-change-a-narcissist-psychologists-answer-without-hesitation-428646\">Can a narcissist really change?<\/a>: what psychologists answer, and what it means for you.<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\/vie-amoureuse\/these-7-evening-rituals-that-happy-couples-share-431716\">Evening rituals of happy couples<\/a>: seven simple habits to stay close day after day.<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\/vie-amoureuse\/the-777-rule-avoid-routine-in-a-relationship-436391\">The 7-7-7 rule<\/a>: a simple plan to keep routine from taking over your relationship.<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\/vie-amoureuse\/romantic-cliches-in-cinema-have-taught-us-to-believe-446825\">Romantic movie myths<\/a>: the clich\u00e9s about love that films taught us to believe.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h2>Frequently asked questions<\/h2>\n<h3>How can you tell if a relationship is toxic?<\/h3>\n<p>A relationship becomes toxic when one partner controls, belittles or isolates the other: checking their phone, constant criticism, emotional blackmail, swinging between passionate declarations and coldness. \u201cNarcissist\u201d gets used loosely online, but narcissistic personality disorder is a clinical diagnosis: focus on behaviors rather than labels. If you\u2019re facing violence, contact a domestic violence hotline or your local emergency services.<\/p>\n<h3>What are the five love languages?<\/h3>\n<p>Developed by American marriage counselor Gary Chapman, the five love languages are words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service and physical touch. The idea is that each person tends to express and receive affection in a preferred way. It\u2019s a popular framework for avoiding misunderstandings, not a scientifically validated theory.<\/p>\n<h3>How can you meet someone without dating apps?<\/h3>\n<p>Connections often grow out of activities you repeat over time: a sports club, a choir, a community group, volunteering, evening classes. Say yes to invitations, let friends introduce you to their circle, and start conversations around a shared interest. The goal isn\u2019t to impress at all costs but to create more chances to connect.<\/p>\n<p>Keep exploring: find all our <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\">sex and relationship topics<\/a>, pleasure and sexual health in <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\/sexualite\">Sexuality<\/a>, wedding planning and anniversaries in <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/sexo\/mariage\">Marriage<\/a>, and tools to stand your ground in <a href=\"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/psycho\/confiance-en-soi\">Self-confidence<\/a>.<\/p>","cat_name":"Love life","category_nicename":"vie-amoureuse","category_parent":6135}]},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/439887","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/8395"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=439887"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/439887\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":439991,"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/439887\/revisions\/439991"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/439888"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=439887"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=439887"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=439887"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}