If your partner has already used the adjective "crazy" to describe his exes and enjoys portraying them as "psychological cases," the problem might not lie with them. Labeling exes as uncontrollable neurotics or hysterics who belong in an asylum is a bad habit among men. According to some men's post-breakup narratives, women always come off worse and deserve to be put in a straitjacket. Behind this tearful plea lies a misogynistic discourse.<\/p>\n
Talking about exes<\/a> is almost inevitable when starting a new relationship. Without necessarily going into detail, we outline the main points of these failed romances. This conversation isn't always pleasant, and generally, we try to be brief. Yet, some men paint a detailed psychological portrait of their exes, and the picture is sometimes quite bleak. To hear them tell it, they practically lived through years of misery with someone who felt like the devil incarnate.<\/p>\n They adopt the victim mentality and arrive at the final conclusion, \u201call my exes were crazy,\u201d as if these men had simply been unlucky in the romantic lottery. While women can exhibit neuroses and manipulative behavior, they are a minority when it comes to using these toxic methods of emotional blackmail and belittling. According to statistics<\/a> , narcissistic women represent approximately 25% of reported cases. However, if we are to believe the words of some men, these statistics are too low to be true. While in principle, we try not to over-praise our exes, there are men who reduce them to pejorative adjectives: \u201cExcessive,\u201d \u201cimpulsive,\u201d \u201cunmanageable,\u201d \u201cunpredictable\u201d... It's practically a matter for psychiatry. And as an attentive listener, conditioned by female rivalry, we quickly find ourselves siding with the narrator of the story.<\/p>\n However, on social media, women are unanimous: when a man says \u201call my exes are crazy,\u201d it\u2019s a red flag. But many of us fall into the trap and end up cursing this ex vicariously. \u201cIn therapy, we talk about \u2018externalization\u2019: the entire problem is placed on the other person, without any personal self-reflection,\u201d explains Laurane Wattecamps, a sexologist and couples therapist with Gael<\/a> .<\/p>\n The now commonplace expression \u201cmy exes are crazy\u201d is rife with sexist undertones. Since time immemorial, whenever women are too loud, have a strong personality, or express their discontent, they are attributed serious psychological problems, as if to discredit their words. In the past, this was a well-established medical-political tactic.<\/p>\n From the Suffragettes to Virginia Woolf, many women have been labeled hysterical and subjected to harsh diagnoses of mental disorders for rebelling. "It was a catch-all concept that was used for a long time to disqualify women deemed too expressive, too independent, or unconventional. At the time, it was a way to silence them and keep them under a certain degree of social control," the specialist explains.<\/p>\n By saying \u201cmy exes are crazy,\u201d men perpetuate the idea of the \u201cpsychologically unstable woman\u201d and grant themselves a sense of superiority. Women, raised to be demure and avoid making waves, are judged \u201cexcessive\u201d or accused of \u201cdramatizing\u201d as soon as they express anger or raise their voice. This gender norm works against them in post-breakup conversations, and what seems normal for a man suddenly appears disproportionate on a woman\u2019s scale.<\/p>\n By portraying their exes as crazy, men plead not guilty and absolve themselves of any potential wrongdoing in these past relationships. By accusing their former partners of infidelity and presenting them as excellent Freudian subjects, they maintain their aura of superiority. Ultimately, by altering the narrative and greatly exaggerating reality, they absolve themselves of all responsibility. "In any situation, there are always two sides to every story. Being so categorical in saying that the other person is 'crazy' is often a refusal to question oneself," the expert insists.<\/p>\n According to her, these false accusations, beyond portraying women as something they are not, reflect a serious lack of emotional intelligence. This already foreshadows endless conflicts, pointless arguments, and an inability to admit wrongdoing. It's the same kind of vicious partner who says things like, "You're overreacting," "You're making a mountain out of a molehill," "You're too emotional," and who's quick to tell people to "calm down."<\/p>\n The phrase \u201cmy ex is crazy\u201d also suggests that the person is still deeply hurt by the breakup and hasn't moved on. It's misplaced resentment, the lingering effects of inner turmoil. \u201cWhen the emotional intensity is still so high that you practically insult your ex-partner, it says something about a relationship that isn't completely over yet,\u201d concludes Laurane Wattecamps.<\/p>\n If your crush utters that fateful phrase and compares their exes to Freudian subjects, it doesn't bode well for the future. The demons of their story are most likely buried deep within them.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"If your partner has already used the adjective "crazy" to describe his exes and enjoys portraying them as...","protected":false},"author":8340,"featured_media":444550,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"disable_msn":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5717],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-444547","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-vie-amoureuse"],"image":{"medium":["https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/06\/Toutes-mes-exs-sont-folles_-red-flag-200x113.jpg",200,113,true],"large":["https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/06\/Toutes-mes-exs-sont-folles_-red-flag-500x281.jpg",500,281,true]},"custom":{"td_video":"","featured_image":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/06\/Toutes-mes-exs-sont-folles_-red-flag.jpg","author":{"name":"\u00c9milie Laurent","avatar":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/11\/cropped-2f5d8c00d5d5c27f8ce4d9b3f9015467-96x96.png"},"categories":[{"term_id":5717,"name":"Love life","slug":"vie-amoureuse","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":5885,"taxonomy":"category","description":" The Love life section of The Body Optimist unpacks relationships in all their forms: dating, attraction, life as a couple, jealousy, breakups and being single. Advice from therapists, psychological insights and personal stories help you build healthy, balanced relationships, with no pressure to couple up and no one-size-fits-all model.<\/p>\n Getting over a breakup takes time, and the pain often feels like grief: sadness, anger, nostalgia and relief can take turns. A few steps help you through it: limit contact with your ex and the urge to check their social media, put away objects that stir up memories, lean on friends and family rather than isolating yourself, get back to your routines (sleep, meals, movement) and reinvest in activities that are yours alone. Writing down what you feel helps put your thoughts in order. If the sadness lasts for weeks and keeps you from functioning day to day, a therapist can help you move forward.<\/p>\n We don\u2019t see being in a couple as a goal to reach: single, exclusive, living together without marrying or in a decades-long relationship, every path deserves to be told without judgment. Our articles reject the idea that you need to change your body to be loved, and remind you that excessive jealousy and control are never proof of love. They speak to all couples, straight and LGBTQIA+, and offer guidance without claiming to replace couples therapy or psychological support.<\/p>\n A relationship becomes toxic when one partner controls, belittles or isolates the other: checking their phone, constant criticism, emotional blackmail, swinging between passionate declarations and coldness. \u201cNarcissist\u201d gets used loosely online, but narcissistic personality disorder is a clinical diagnosis: focus on behaviors rather than labels. If you\u2019re facing violence, contact a domestic violence hotline or your local emergency services.<\/p>\n Developed by American marriage counselor Gary Chapman, the five love languages are words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service and physical touch. The idea is that each person tends to express and receive affection in a preferred way. It\u2019s a popular framework for avoiding misunderstandings, not a scientifically validated theory.<\/p>\n Connections often grow out of activities you repeat over time: a sports club, a choir, a community group, volunteering, evening classes. Say yes to invitations, let friends introduce you to their circle, and start conversations around a shared interest. The goal isn\u2019t to impress at all costs but to create more chances to connect.<\/p>\n Keep exploring: find all our sex and relationship topics<\/a>, pleasure and sexual health in Sexuality<\/a>, wedding planning and anniversaries in Marriage<\/a>, and tools to stand your ground in Self-confidence<\/a>.<\/p>","parent":6135,"count":709,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":5717,"category_count":709,"category_description":" The Love life section of The Body Optimist unpacks relationships in all their forms: dating, attraction, life as a couple, jealousy, breakups and being single. Advice from therapists, psychological insights and personal stories help you build healthy, balanced relationships, with no pressure to couple up and no one-size-fits-all model.<\/p>\n Getting over a breakup takes time, and the pain often feels like grief: sadness, anger, nostalgia and relief can take turns. A few steps help you through it: limit contact with your ex and the urge to check their social media, put away objects that stir up memories, lean on friends and family rather than isolating yourself, get back to your routines (sleep, meals, movement) and reinvest in activities that are yours alone. Writing down what you feel helps put your thoughts in order. If the sadness lasts for weeks and keeps you from functioning day to day, a therapist can help you move forward.<\/p>\n We don\u2019t see being in a couple as a goal to reach: single, exclusive, living together without marrying or in a decades-long relationship, every path deserves to be told without judgment. Our articles reject the idea that you need to change your body to be loved, and remind you that excessive jealousy and control are never proof of love. They speak to all couples, straight and LGBTQIA+, and offer guidance without claiming to replace couples therapy or psychological support.<\/p>\n A relationship becomes toxic when one partner controls, belittles or isolates the other: checking their phone, constant criticism, emotional blackmail, swinging between passionate declarations and coldness. \u201cNarcissist\u201d gets used loosely online, but narcissistic personality disorder is a clinical diagnosis: focus on behaviors rather than labels. If you\u2019re facing violence, contact a domestic violence hotline or your local emergency services.<\/p>\n Developed by American marriage counselor Gary Chapman, the five love languages are words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service and physical touch. The idea is that each person tends to express and receive affection in a preferred way. It\u2019s a popular framework for avoiding misunderstandings, not a scientifically validated theory.<\/p>\n Connections often grow out of activities you repeat over time: a sports club, a choir, a community group, volunteering, evening classes. Say yes to invitations, let friends introduce you to their circle, and start conversations around a shared interest. The goal isn\u2019t to impress at all costs but to create more chances to connect.<\/p>\n Keep exploring: find all our sex and relationship topics<\/a>, pleasure and sexual health in Sexuality<\/a>, wedding planning and anniversaries in Marriage<\/a>, and tools to stand your ground in Self-confidence<\/a>.<\/p>","cat_name":"Love life","category_nicename":"vie-amoureuse","category_parent":6135}]},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/444547","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/8340"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=444547"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/444547\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":445510,"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/444547\/revisions\/445510"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/444550"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=444547"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=444547"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ma-grande-taille.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=444547"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}} The modern version of the myth of the \u201chysterical woman\u201d<\/h2>\n
An easy excuse to preserve one's image<\/h2>\n
What you\u2019ll find in the Love life section<\/h2>\n
\n
How do you get over a breakup?<\/h2>\n
Our take on love<\/h2>\n
Where to start<\/h2>\n
\n
Frequently asked questions<\/h2>\n
How can you tell if a relationship is toxic?<\/h3>\n
What are the five love languages?<\/h3>\n
How can you meet someone without dating apps?<\/h3>\n
What you\u2019ll find in the Love life section<\/h2>\n
\n
How do you get over a breakup?<\/h2>\n
Our take on love<\/h2>\n
Where to start<\/h2>\n
\n
Frequently asked questions<\/h2>\n
How can you tell if a relationship is toxic?<\/h3>\n
What are the five love languages?<\/h3>\n
How can you meet someone without dating apps?<\/h3>\n