From a young age, you've been trying to find your calling or ignite a passion, but to no avail. Everything only mildly interests you. Nothing truly excites you. There isn't one hobby that transcends you more than another, and in social situations, admitting this is almost shameful. While some people have strong passions that resonate with them every day, you can't say the same. And rest assured, this isn't a sign of being jaded.
Not having a passion: why is that normal?
You enjoy drawing, but only to alleviate boredom. You read occasionally, without necessarily being enthralled by words. In short, you don't have any apparent passions, except perhaps drinking on a terrace or stroking your dog. That famous passion, the one that's supposed to make you forget everything else and flood you with dopamine. More than an option, it seems almost required to shine in social situations.
It's a question that comes up constantly, from job interviews to dates . And if you deign to answer in the negative, you risk coming across as boring or unpleasant. So, you cheat by inventing a keen interest in cinema when you haven't seen a third of the classic films. You suddenly discover a passion for photography when the only photos you own are poorly framed or completely blurry.
Having no passion in your life is almost shameful. And everyone around you keeps saying "it'll come" as if your passion were simply "dormant." Except that after participating in creative workshops, trying writing courses, and taking acting classes, you haven't had that "aha" moment. While some people find fulfillment in sewing, literature, gardening, or horseback riding, you've never had that "spark."
Eric Bénevaut, a psychoanalyst specializing in creative existential therapy, puts this reality into perspective. "There are few people who are not interested in anything, except those who are depressed. On the other hand, there are countless people who do not want to delve deeper into subjects or activities, either because it is in their character, or because they do not want to cut themselves off from this diversity of possibilities," he explains in the pages of Madame Figaro .
Proof of great curiosity and an open mind
In an age where passions are displayed as proof of success on social media, it's easy to feel guilty and inferior. When you see a girl knitting a cardigan on the subway or a man devouring a book with palpable fervor, you feel an inner unease. You wonder what you did to deserve such a judgment. Yet, you may not have a single passion, but you're interested in just about anything, whether it's cooking, volleyball, music, or dance. In short, you don't let a single passion define you; you prefer to explore and keep other avenues open.
You don't fully commit to a hobby; you're constantly experimenting. Instead of throwing yourself body and soul into a single pastime, you prefer to broaden your horizons, to test, to discover. And first of all, why should one passion be more legitimate than another? How is collecting corks less "marketable" than painting random lines? Watching kitten videos online or doing puzzles, even those labeled "suitable for ages 3 and up," could easily be "enough." Except that in a society that demands productivity even in leisure time, it isn't.
But it's also a question of temperament
For the psychoanalyst, a passion can be "an exclusive occupation, which can be all-consuming and which corresponds to a real desire", but also "a way of preventing oneself from seeing another, more painful reality".
In other words, passion isn't always an indicator of happiness or success; it can be an escape, a refuge from chaos. It's no coincidence that artists are often described as tormented souls. And if you lack a passion, it's not necessarily a deficiency; sometimes it's a sign that you're fully present in your daily life, without needing an emotional crutch to fill your hours.
Developing a passion, yet another social pressure
In our society, passion has become an implicit obligation. Social media is overflowing with photos of lush vegetable gardens, detailed travel journals, DIY workshops, and intense workout routines. Creativity and productivity are glorified, even in leisure time. As a result, if you don't strive for excellence in a particular area, you feel guilty about "wasting" your time. "In our economy-driven society, companies crave people who see things through to the end, like top athletes, because it implies total commitment," argues the psychoanalyst.
This injunction is illusory and counterproductive. There is no universal standard for how to spend your free time. Trying out several activities without ever being completely passionate about them doesn't mean you're lazy or superficial; on the contrary. It reveals a constant curiosity, an open mind, and an ability to savor life in all its forms, without limiting yourself to a single path.
You can be fully yourself, happy and fulfilled, even without a single, all-consuming passion. Sometimes, the greatest luxury isn't giving everything to a hobby, but being able to explore freely, laugh, wander, and savor the small joys of each moment.
