While older generations would yell at their children and easily raise their voices, today's parents get their messages across by singing. Instead of threatening with the infamous countdown to three or straining their voices in vain, they give their commands in rhythm. This helps to defuse situations that have traumatized many a child in the past.
Why singing works (much better than you might imagine)
Your child hasn't put away their toys even though you've told them fifteen times? They came home with muddy shoes? Forget about scolding them or raising your voice to give them a lecture. Yelling has never really proven effective. It mainly creates a climate of fear in the home. One mother has found a much more efficient and less energy-draining approach than shouting . And she provides a convincing demonstration in a video shared by parenting coach @christophe_maurel_.
To make the requests more palatable, she tried a novel approach, much gentler and more peaceful than that of our ancestors, who relied on "no" and punishments. Since children are more receptive to melodies, she improvised a sound in place of the usual staring. In the video, we see her daughter preparing an amazing snack and leaving the room, leaving everything unfinished on the table. The mother, instead of getting angry and having a meltdown, uses her vocal cords more cleverly. She reminds her daughter of the basics of good manners with the flow of Eminem and rhymes with the household rules. The little girl complies without a murmur, even letting out a little laugh of approval at the end.
No, it's not witchcraft, just science mixed with kindness . Singing engages a part of the brain linked to pleasure, curiosity, and relaxation. As a result, a stressed or overstimulated child responds better to a melody than to a blunt command. This is what psychologists call an "emotional bypass": circumventing natural resistance by avoiding anything resembling a direct order.
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Transforming moments of tension into moments of connection
Giving orders through song is a way to get your voice heard and cultivate family harmony in the process. While shouting and reprimands tend to create a wall between parents and children, singing brings everyone into harmony. In the video, the mother not only finds an alternative to harsh words and brute authority, but she also encourages cooperation rather than confrontation. The coach, who works to promote parental well-being, speaks of " conscious parenting ." Singing is both a gentle outlet for parents and a fun activity for children.
When parents yell, the message conveyed is no longer just an order; emotions take center stage. The child no longer hears, "Put your shoes on." They hear, "I'm angry with you." As a result, resistance increases, the parent becomes irritated, and the cycle continues.
Singing breaks this vicious cycle. It softens the atmosphere, reassures, and reconnects. Better yet, it puts the parent in a more relaxed position, which directly influences the child's reaction. You no longer become the rigid authority figure, but rather someone who encourages collaboration. It's also a subtle way to set a good example: managing stress without losing your temper, transforming challenges into creativity, and showing that you can earn respect calmly.
A surprising, yet profoundly human tool
Previous generations believed that parents should be "feared." The slightest sound of footsteps in the house foreshadowed trouble, and the children would all take cover. While this method might not sound harsh enough to the older generation, raised with the cane and the belt, it is nonetheless healthier than any other. And the saying "music soothes the savage beast" takes on its full meaning. While shouting divides and shatters harmony, singing brings people together.
Ultimately, singing to give instructions is a return to something very instinctive: lullabies, nursery rhymes, musical rituals that have soothed and supported children for generations. It's not about being permissive or relinquishing authority. It's about introducing creativity and gentleness where tension might otherwise arise. Because being a parent sometimes means improvising, often adapting… and occasionally, inventing a little song to survive bath time.
Giving orders through song is a way to change the tune in children's upbringing and to tone down the reprimands. It's also a way to preserve your own mental health and that of your children.
